Sunshine

Y'know what makes me happy? This movie on my shoulder.

2.8% of the proceeds from this joke will go to John Denver's widow

What's Eating Gilbert Grape?

ANSWER: His big, fat mom

OK, so I feel kind of bad about this one... But, not as bad as Fatty Mom-Burger!

Crackheads Gone Wild

As opposed to the sedate, tea-sipping crackheads to which we're all accustomed

Speed 2: Cruise Control

Comes with optional Speed 3: Anti-Lock Brakes

Black Mama, White Mama

This is, word for word, how my mother introduced me to her lesbian lover(s)

Being Mick: You Would If You Could

Gee, someone's full of himself. But, enough about me...

Ransom

"Give me back my $10 admission fee!"

[see, I replaced "son" with something more accurate]